Read My Kink

This past weekend has been quite the emotional journey for me; from realising how much of an exhibitionist I am, to reconfirming my thirst for ownership.  The events of last Friday caught me off guard, as I found myself surprised at my actions, yet enjoying them all the same. It showed me just how much about myself I do not yet know, and only made me want to learn more about myself.

It was a typical Friday night for me, as I sat in my usual Second Cup, reading my biology textbook and being bored.  I had planned to stay there until closing, trying to absorb as much information as possible before my midterm exam.  As if he sense my boredom, a close friend of mine, Fritz, called and asked me if I wanted to accompany him and another friend, Johann, to an old friend, Klaus’s house.  I half-heartedly agreed, knowing that I would not be able to concentrate on my textbook much longer, and waited for Fritz to come find me.  I was half asleep in a very comfortable chair when Fritz arrived at the coffee shop.  I packed up my things, followed him out to Johann’s car and greeted him, as we began to drive to Klaus’s house.

The evening began innocently; we were sitting in front of the television, playing Monopoly and watching The Simpsons, until we all got fed up with the game.  We decided it would be fun to check out the local strip club; however, to our dismay, our plans failed.  Now because we had all had our minds set on going to the strip club, we got back to the house restless and horny.  The only way to solve that issue is to turn on some porn.  We took turns choosing videos to watch, from dark dungeon bondage videos to typical vanilla (boring) videos.

I was sitting on Klaus’s lap, when he commented that my crotch was getting warmer and warmer.  I will admit, that the porn was turning me on.  I do not know what happened, but before I knew it, Klaus brought me to his room and showed me a few toys – a large dildo that felt like a real cock, a vibrating dildo, and a really powerful mini vibrator.  He told me that they would be in his room if I wanted them, but that if I wanted to use them, he had to be able to watch.  I hesitated at first, because my “therapist,” Fritz would also be sitting in the audience.  After giving Fritz a couple of glances and making sure it was okay, I decided to pull out the toys.

It started out innocently enough, I used the mini vibrator over my jeans.  But soon enough I was in my panties, and then lying bare-assed on Fritz’s lap.  What shocked me though, was that I was not shy or ashamed.  No, I enjoyed every minute of it.  Before I knew it, it was as if Fritz was directing an amateur porno.  “Klaus, choke her.  Now Johann, you slap her thighs.  Beautiful!”  It was certainly nice to have my vanilla(ish) friends participate with some level of kink.

During that time on the couch, I had three orgasms; two more than I would normally have on any given night.  We later retired to Klaus’s room, where I continued to play witht he toys.  Two more orgasms had passed, and I was exhausted, when Klaus offered me some money for one more orgasm.  On top of that, Johann offered to double that money.  I was already really tired, and I had always told myself that I would never perform sexually for money; but I am a “starving student” and well, the idea of getting paid to masturbate for people made me wet.

The last orgasm was different.  For one thing, Johann fingered me while I used the vibrator on my clit.  For another, I had to ask before I came.  When I was just on the brink of an orgasm, I asked, almost begged to cum; but Klaus, being mean, kept saying no.  I do not know what is worse; being denied an orgasm several times, or cumming for the sixth time in one night.  I am also not quite sure why I obeyed Klaus when he told me not to cum. It does not make any sense, as I just met him and saw him as a “vanilla” friend.  I suppose something inside me wanted to be pleasing. After making me suffer for a bit, Klaus finally let me relieve myself.  It felt great, but at the same time, I was just about ready to collapse.  I was all cummed out.

There are a couple of things I took out of this Friday.  One of the most significant things is that I realised how much of an exhibitionist I am, as opposed to what I thought I was.  It felt great to put my body on display for people to see.  There was no nervousness on my end, and it felt great.  I had always told myself that I would never sell my body; but I think my mind has changed.  I do not know where this new discovery will take me, but I am certainly looking forward to wherever that will be.

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